Slumber
by WielderofBlade
Summary: When's she's awake, she's Meadow Marsden - a woman with this paranoia which convinces her to learn self defense. But when she's sleeping, she's Meadow Marsden who makes shawarma for the Avengers. It isn't until the Chitauri invasion where she realizes that she can't wake up. Bucky/OC later on. No slash.
1. Chapter 1: The Awakening

**Hey guys! This is my second try at Avengers fanfiction. Have fun reading :)**

**One. **

Screaming is enough to wake me up.

I sprang up from my bed, heart pounding and my heavy sheets falling as I panted and scanned my surroundings to figure out where I was. It felt like I needed new lungs, especially after what I had just been through.

After catching my breath I leaned my head back against the wall. I was in my room, thankfully. Usually after dreams like those I end up being somewhere completely unrelated to where I had laid to sleep. At times I found myself laying on the blades of grass outside my house, staring up at the starry sky. Other times I find myself right in front of the fridge with several eggs splattered on the ground. Sleeping was never that great of an experience for me, because whenever I sleep, it ends up being a bigger deal than usual.

It had all started when I was three. Or at least - that's as far as up to when I can remember. When I would explain to others the people I had seen and places I've been, they'd just assume that I was this imaginative child that could see the moon in daylight. But what they didn't realize was that it was actually possible.

Yes, I visited another universe when I slept. A universe so real and detailed, that I wasn't sure whether I was sleeping or not when I was there. I had no other way to keep track of both worlds, so I named one Marvel. Marvel still had the general continents and all, but everyone I knew there was different. I guess you could say that when I was in Marvel, I was having a lucid dream. I was aware that I was dreaming, but also in some sort of wacky way I convinced myself that everything was real just because I could feel things.

This had put a large dispute among my conscious. Which was the real world? Which one actually counts, which did I make up?

I guess the answer to that was easy - Marvel wasn't real. I wanted to tell myself that to make things easier but I couldn't because of what I had previously experienced there. That and I had also thought about it through the years - all because I'm there when I'm sleeping doesn't mean that it's not actually happening. I'm still surprised with all the things that happen, just like when I'm awake. This confusing question always had lingered in my mind, but as years passed I learned to live with it just like any other human being would.

Marvel was real. Just having it made me a civilian in both worlds. I had decided this statement when I was fourteen. That was thirteen years ago.

Now, at the age of 27, I trudge out of bed and force myself out of my warm room out into the dark cold hall of my mother's house. Yes, I still live with my mother - whom worries over me constantly. If she ever lost sight over me, she'd freak. She'd even call the police and convince them to file in a missing person, even though she can't do that unless I've been missing for over 3 days.

I made my way over to the fridge and slipped out a Pepsi bottle, making my way back to my room and dimming the lights just a bit. Of course, my mother still treats me like I'm a child, so staying up late isn't usually a thing she approves of. Although I had just awoken from an intense dream, I find my eyelids slightly flailing. There were still voices in my head, giving me a headache - like someone was trying to tell me something. Murmuring, whispering, like there was static everywhere. That's when I heard a horn, more yelling, and then wake up.

* * *

"Although I'd like to know how and why you're sleeping in the middle of the day, ma'am, it doesn't seem like there's enough time. I advise you to wake, _now."_

I hear a confident voice above me, and I force my eyes open once I hear another _Bang!_

"Wha...?" I simply say, my eyes darting around to find the source of the voice. That's when I met him - Captain America.

"Duck!" He screamed at me, and I immediately did as told. I heard another explosion behind me, and put up my arms to guard myself. But that didn't need to happen, because the man (he was just simply a muscular patriotic man in a red-white-and-blue suit) hovered over me with his shield against my back, protecting any force of the explosion away from me.

Screams were heard from above, and with curiosity I gazed up to see several people running around with their hands over their heads, scattering about. Steve - or the crazy man wearing red-white-and-blue at the time - got off me and lent me a hand.

"I'm terribly sorry about the raucous, but there seems to be an invasion. I recommend _not _running around and oh - just don't get into any trouble. This'll be over before you know it," he smiled, and with that picked up his shield.

"Pleased to meet you, ma'am," he said with a salute, and ran off.

"Pleasure's all mine..." I responded to no one. I wasn't sure what to make of this, because mostly confusion overwhelmed me. It wasn't until then I really did notice the surroundings around me. In fact, even to this day it's not like I'd want to remember how it looked like because New York was a total mess.

I heard another explosion, which knocked me out of my strain of trance. I had to get out of here now.

Without another look behind me, I started to run away from the mess - which was quite difficult as I can even recall to this day conceivably because when it came to the Loki, making a mess was his specialty. I finally run out to the main street, where I see them for the first time together - The Avengers.

Well, at the time with my luck they looked like a bunch of people in stylish suits and a giant green man but that's besides the point.

I could see Cap giving orders to the others, when I felt a hand grasp my face which makes my heart jump.

Remembering my self-defense classes, I elbow the chitauri in the stomach with my right arm, bringing him over to my left side. With that, I take my left hand and cover his mouth, kicking him in the nuts. Of course, I have my first couple of seconds of glory until I realise that he's much more stronger than I am. Even as he starts to lose balance and almost falls to the ground, he takes his gun and aims at my heart.


	2. Chapter 2: Found

**Thanks a bunch for the reviews/favs/follows! **

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**Two. **

I've heard from people who've experienced near death situations that your life passes right before your eyes. Of course, I have no idea whether that was entirely true or not because there wasn't one moment where I almost died.

I had assumed that I woke up once the Chitauri shot at me, because I had hastily opened my eyes to stare up at a white ceiling. I had that feeling back again - the one where I had no idea where I was. Since my encounter with both worlds, it wasn't anything new for me.

I forced myself up and felt a sharp pain against my neck. I realised I had a headache, as well. Closing my eyes and shaking my head, I swung my legs over at the side of the bed.

That was also when I realised that I wasn't at my mother's house. This place was completely different, along the wall sat a plant with pencils and papers scattered everywhere.

"Sir... Found the weapon... It's officially Item 33," I heard a voice from out the door. Curious, I balanced myself up and carefully made my way toward the doorframe.

"Sorry - where the hell am I?" I asked, feeling lightheaded.

The two men who were hunched down, talking among themselves spun around immediately.

The man on the right was a tall, dark intimidating man. He wore a long trench coat and he had an eye patch stuck to his face. I would've questioned it, but he was glaring down at me in confusion so sharply, I had to recall everything I had done just to make sure I didn't do anything that would make a stranger angry.

The man on the left was the same man with the star-spangled shield. He wasn't wearing the suit anymore, just a leather jacket and jeans. His blonde hair was cut in a different way as well, the top standing up just so slightly.

"I thought you said she was in a coma," the blonde said, turning over to Eyepatches.

He continued to glare at me while responding, "She's the first one up."

Eyepatches leaned back and whispered something in Blonde's ear, and relief overwhelmed me once he strutted away.

"Steve Rogers," Steve said, taking out his hand. Now he seemed a bit more unconfident, with an awkward pose as I shook his hand with an eyebrow raised.

"Meadow Marsden," I simply replied.

It didn't make sense. I was shot, so doesn't that mean I wake up in the other world? In Marvel I didn't really have a definite identity. I always walked around everywhere meeting new people. Hunger and pain didn't usually bother me, but right now I had a massive headache. In a way, I couldn't remember the whole entire part where he actually shot me, only when the Chitauri aimed the gun.

"Do you remember anything?" Steve asked, walking into my hospital room. He took a chair out and offered me one like a gentlemen.

As he sat down next to me, all I could reply was, "Not really."

Steve nodded, looking away for a second.  
"The alien - Chitauri - didn't shoot you. We realised this a while back when we saw civilians with the same situation. Instead they put something inside you, which they recognized as a microchip," He tried to explained.

A microchip wasn't what I had expected. In fact, I wasn't even entirely sure what it was.

I wanted to ask Steve why I wouldn't wake up, but whenever I tried to explain to someone my situation it never really worked. I always ended up either in a mental institute or with a bad reputation.

"Will it hurt me?" I finally asked.

Steve shrugged. "We don't know yet. The microchip is, well, microscopic. The only way to figure out the affects is to study it. But it's still in your body somewhere. I don't know the full details but you're one of the only people that we found with this thing in you," he edged on, and I figured he had something to ask me.

"Where are you getting at?" I said, eager to getting to the point.

"We need just a bit more time. When we get the microchip out of you, we'll let you go. But for now bear with us," he said.

I thought about it for a moment. "Who is us?"

That made Steve lower his gaze. Biting his lip, he said, "I'm not sure I can say, but between you and me, it's this organization called SHIELD." He said.

Steve repudiated to go on any further, much to my annoyance, but in a way I was grateful that he actually told me something. Perhaps the microchip was the reason why I couldn't wake up. But what of my mother in the other world? Wouldn't she worry?

I decided to let my body do what it wanted, because I couldn't just force myself awake. Since Marvel was such a real place for me, I didn't want to do something incredibly stupid just to wake myself up in the other world. Besides, I always liked Marvel better.

"Ma'am," Steve said, breaking my thoughts. I didn't realise that he was still talking, "The only reason why Fury let me in was because I told him I knew you, so before he asks me himself, do you have any family you'd like to contact?"

I wasn't really sure what to say. The obvious answer was no, but I needed to figure out how to wake up. I hoped Steve wouldn't question it, because I really didn't plan on staying at Marvel for long. Once they got this microchip out of my body, I was sure to wake up. The only thing that concerned me was that my mother would be convinced I was in a coma.

"Not at the current moment, no," I finally decided to tell him. He smiled at me slightly and got up to leave. Surprisingly, he didn't say anything to it. I guess it was because I was just simply making his job easier.

"And if we'll be seeing more of each other," I said right before he was about to walk out, "Then you can just call me Meadow."

S

I was beginning to worry once several days had passed and SHIELD still couldn't extract the microchip from my blood. I was moved several of times, and I overheard someone talking about not having a professional to take out the microchips. Also, many times I was questioned about my identity. I simply replied telling them that I was just passing through, or that I just wander from here and there. I could tell that they weren't overly content with my reply, but I decided there was nothing else to tell them. I just wanted to wake up.

Finally, the organization itself was fed up from keeping secrets. I didn't know back then that being aware of SHIELD was such a big thing, because Steve told me immediately. I didn't know Steve that much back then, only that he was the infamous Captain America and he worked for SHIELD in some sort of way. He didn't fully join SHIELD until a while after an incident in Malibu in early May 2013, and by then I had already been a guest in the helicarrier.

One of Fury's agents came in personally into one of my hospital rooms (this one was exquisite, it had a jacuzzi and everything) and set up a meeting with him. I wasn't overly excited, but excited, because it was awfully boring sitting there in the rooms day after day. That had happened at least one month after being moved around from hospital to hospital.

Finally, I got a room in the helicarrier. I would see Steve a couple of times, even stop to chat with him. But the helicarrier wasn't even that great – everyone was so busy all the time.

I was still stressing over the whole thing with my mother and even my father at this point – I was in a coma for over a month. This microchip needed to be removed, I had to tell someone. So the only reliable person I could tell was the person protecting me – Fury.

I had seconds thoughts several of times, because even now Fury was still convinced I had no idea what SHIELD was. That and I wasn't even sure what Fury was protecting me from, he just told me that there was this thing in my body that needed to be studied, that it wasn't natural. I needed to figure some things out, and honestly it wasn't like Fury could get angry over something like snooping around after being lied to for over a month.

So that's what I did – I snooped around.

This was right before the Mandarin incident. I escaped from my room, eager to figure out SHIELD's dirty little secrets. Although I didn't get too far into the helicarrier, I definitely got something to start my little mission.

After running down a couple of halls, which all looked the same, I reached a darker hall which I didn't know existed. See, Maria Hill had toured me – explaining every inch of the place. The only places I was really aloud to go to was the cafeteria or the gym, and let's all be honest it's not like I was actually going to go to the gym. Of course, I still got to see where everything else was, but I was only aloud to be there in dire emergency.

But the darker hall was different. Maria never showed me it, and frankly I was curious.

Ducking down, I slid against the wall trying to make sure no one followed me. If I wanted answers, of course they'd be down an eerie hall with no cameras. I continued to tip-toe until I heard some voices.

_"__The Winter Soldier… Files… Hydra," _

I reminded myself to make a mental note of everything that was being said as I edged closer, even though it was a pretty stupid idea. Later I had reminded myself not to get too far into clichés, but when it came to Marvel risks weren't than risky… If that even makes sense. I guess you can assume that I always wake up right before I get killed or fall. That was what I was expecting, the whole situation with not waking up in over a month hadn't crossed my mind. I was too curious to think about anything else.

_"__But the girl! They're still trying to extract the flea from her blood… We must act quickly… we must ruin Aim…"_

I didn't get to listen to the rest, because then the voices started to come closer. Heart pounding quickly, I ran towards the nearest lighted hall, hoping that the agents wouldn't hear me.

"What the _hell_ are you doing?"

Too late.


	3. Chapter 3: Captive

**A/N: Thanks so much for the reviews! Wow, this is awesome. This next chapter will be a little short, but it's where the plot starts to kick off. We'll be seeing Bucky soon, I promise. Anyways, enjoy! Don't forget to review :)**

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**Three. **

**May 2013**

I was in a shit load of trouble.

I was under surveillance and wasn't aloud to even go to the cafeteria unless I was escorted. Usually I had my food brought to me, since SHIELD needed me for their own problems they were trying to be nice.

But still, the fact that I wasn't aloud to leave my room by myself made me a bit angry.

With not much to do in my room and every action of mine being watched, I could never figure out who the Winter Soldier was, or what Hydra had to do with it. I was aware of the history of Captain America, I even went back and did some research on it because Steve's past was so intriguing. Besides, even for a dead man, Bucky was kind of hot.  
I tried to remember what the agents were saying, but after my near-death encounter with Fury afterwards, my brain went blank and there were only two words that I could even remember. The Winter Soldier and Hydra.

There was only a limited amount of research I could do, conceivably because it wasn't like SHIELD couldn't check my internet browsing history.

"This is a big load of shit. Why can't I be let out?!" I asked the guard at front of my door once.

"Ms. Marsden, with all due respect you're under strict surveillance because SHIELD needs to protect you," he simply replied. With a nod he closed the door in front of my face.

So could you say that I hated SHIELD? Almost.

The only reason why I was okay with half of the regulations was because I needed to get this microchip out. The only reason why I was okay with the time of how long it took to find a qualified doctor was because I didn't want to wake up and immediately die in the other world.

On a brighter note, an agent had offered me a drink and an apology. I guess some people know some manners around here. Honestly I was craving some doughnuts, but I didn't mind after that because whatever that agent gave me tasted great. I made a mental note of keeping an eye out for That and SHIELD had finally contacted the doctor they wanted to extract the microchip from. It was Doctor Bruce Banner, also known as the infamous Hulk. Over the month I had become accustomed to the cinematic world inside Marvel, as well as the usual news that hung around. Ever since New York, where all the Avengers has assembled, fans were crazy about the heroes. I didn't realise that the search for a famous doctor who knew more about gamma radiation than surgery was going on.

Infact, I was told that a friend of Doctor Selvig's would be most likely helping me with this test. Yeah, you could say that I was sort of a fan too.

I didn't get to meet Banner a week after I was told the name of the surgeon. It didn't really make sense, they could've gotten anyone else, but they chose Banner. I didn't figure out why until a while after.

The two Avengers I really wanted to meet, though were Hawkeye and the Black Widow. No one had told me that they were put off duty and that there was no way to contact them later, when the day of my surgery there was chaos in the helicarrier. The obvious reason was because Agent Barton had been compromised during the invasion, and that he needed more time until he was back out on the field. I assumed that Agent Romanoff just wanted to stay with him, because to the fanbase it was obvious that they were in love. No one really mentioned it, though.

I guess you could say that I was upset when the microchip was never extracted from my body for the scheduled day. Dr. Banner insisted on doing the surgery then, but Director Fury was so angry at Stark for telling the whole damn world where he lived that not one person could get a blink of sleep. After he was attacked, though, Stark was missing from the wreckage.

Still, the next day people were running around trying to find out where he was and how far he went, how his condition was and if he was even alive. Banner worried most, probably because he was close friends with Mr. Stark.

I decided that I like Tony Stark. He was a genius, but he was hilarious. He had money, but he didn't make weapons anymore.

Other than that flying suit.

"Doctor Banner, I'd like to request that the surgery will be done tomorrow," Fury finally told Banner many hours after the Malibu incident. That was when it was officially decided.

"You ready for this?" Bruce asked me the day before the surgery. The truth was, no. I wasn't. Ever since the damn microchip was stuck in my blood I couldn't wake up. But I could do things in Marcel that I couldn't back when I was awake. In a way, I felt like I was awake with Bruce and Steve and Fury. This was slowly becoming my reality because I couldn't wake up, and the microchip was most likely causing that. I had no other choice.

"Doctor Banner, I think there's something you should know before you carry on with the surgery," I said, stopping in mid-walk. I told myself that if Banner didn't believe me, I needed to find another way to wake up other than extracting the microchip.

"Anything, Meadow. I just need to know any health dis - "

" - It's nothing like that," I cut in, "not exactly."

I wasn't sure how to explain this.

"Do continue, then." He said.

I sighed. "When I sleep in Marvel, I wake up in a different world. But in this different world I can feel things, maybe not as sharply as I can here, but it's real. I know people, I have a mother there. Here it's different, I know people, but I don't have any relatives."

Bruce's brown eyes narrowed, and his eyebrows were knitted together in confusion. He took a while to think, but you could really tell that he was deep in thought.

"Perhaps it's a hallucination, a world your subconscious created because of the tragedy of your reality," he suggested. "How long have you been visiting this place?"

I thought it was kind of funny how certain Dr. Banner was that the universe that was real was Marvel.

"Ever since I can remember," I replied. This made Bruce look even more bewildered. Before he could say anything, I continued.

"It would be that whenever I slept here, I woke there. Whenever I slept there, I woke here. Ever since this chip was inserted into my blood, into my body, I wake up here, in my room in the helicarrier," I finished explaining. Bruce continued to think, sitting down by the seat against the wall.

Because of the chaotic situation in SHIELD, I was allowed outside of my room. We were currently sitting outside of Fury's office, he had called Bruce in for something. There were still agents running around trying to file papers in and figuring out where Stark was.

"My theory is that the microchip somehow controls your sleeping patterns, what makes you wake is being control against it's will. I'm glad you told me this, Ms. Marsden. We'll have to talk about this but first I must speak with Fury," with a flash of a small smile, Bruce thanked me and walked into Fury's office hastily.

I thought about what I had just done and I felt glad. Surprisingly Banner didn't question it as much, that and he was a doctor – right? He'd be able to figure it out. I just couldn't figure out the reason why he was called in, that was what I was so confused about. Did he even know how to do surgery?

I decided that it didn't matter and was relieved that I finally told someone. I spent one month in Marvel, and I didn't even bother to make friends. But when it came to Marvel, I usually just wandered around. I never got hungry, I never had to really go to the bathroom, so it's not like it was easy making friends.

As I made my way back to my room I remembered what Fury had told me. The hall that I was walking through, where I heard the agents talking, wasn't a hall that had anything in it. It was just a dead end, only extending the exterior part of the helicarrier. I just couldn't wait until the surgery, because then finally I could get off this damn ship. Would it be called a ship? I didn't really care, honestly, I was sick and tired of the plane-ish feeling.

I was too tired to feel anything at the end of the day. As I made my way back down the hall to my room, everything felt a little unbalanced and dizzy. My vision continued to be fuzzy, my headache was stronger… Don't worry, I told myself – the door was just a couple of feet away…

I couldn't see. Everything turned black, and the last thing I heard was a chuckle.

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**Chapter 4 Preview:**

His dead, dark eyes examined mine. I couldn't see any emotion - they were so bland. My mouth was taped shut, and although I should have been worrying about my life all I could worry about was how painful it was going to be when they removed the duck-tape.


	4. Chapter 4: Hydra

**Thanks for all the follows and favorites, guys, but that's all I got! I'd love some reviews, some critque on my writing and what you guys think about Meadow overall. Thanks for reading :)**

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**Four. **

My habitual way of waking up in a different place didn't surprise me as much anymore, but knowing that I had woke up in the same room for a month caught me off guard.

With a faint headache, I raised my head up to see where I was. The room was dark, I was closed in and I couldn't see a door. I learned later that the door was behind me, because then I was too interested in the ropes that tied my arms and legs to the wooden chair.

So much for high technologic cells.

With a groan, I tried twisting my body around to see what was behind me, but it was too dark and I was in too much of an awkward position to fully see what was in my peripheral vision. I turned back around, sighing in defeat.

I wasn't going to stay in here, not like this. I needed to find a way to get out.

I looked down at my shoes, then back to the rope. I slam my heel down to the ground and push my left foot towards me, removing the shoe off my foot. With that, I puzzle my way out of the ropes that tied my left foot. It was easier to escape since my huge shoe wasn't in the way.

With one foot free, I attempt to take off my other shoe when I hear something behind me.

"_Are you serious_?!" I shouted, trying to turn around again but failing to see who was standing there. "Come on, man, the least you can do is make me feel good about getting out of the ropes, and then capturing me later. I was actually getting somewhere," I said angrily. I guess I didn't really realise how much of a bad situation I was in, mostly because I was just about to make a bad arse escape.

This was my first time being a captive, so I didn't really know how it worked.

"We need more time. Knock her out," I heard someone else say behind me.

"Hey wait –"

Everything went black again, and I woke up with a sound of metal against metal.

I didn't open my eyes as quickly this time, because I actually took a precaution. I tried to figure out what was going around me just through my sense of hearing.

"Можете ли вы сказать, если девушка не спит?" said a voice. I furrowed my eyebrows, and mentally slapped myself. I just prayed they weren't looking at me.

"I will do so now," A gruff voice replied.

I heard him coming over, his footsteps in a repeating pattern a bit like he was marching. I was scared, I wanted to open up my eyes but I knew better.

"Breathing has become быстрее, she's проснуться."

I felt a cold hand against my face, which made my eyes flutter open.

And then he stared at me, as I stared back in fear.

His dead, blue eyes examined mine. I couldn't see any emotion - they were so bland. My mouth was taped shut, and although I should have been worrying about my life all I could worry about was how painful it was going to be when they removed the duck-tape.

"'Mommdy," I tried to say, but my voice just came out in a mumble. The duck – tape was uncomfortable, but I tried to live with it because I really didn't want to get killed right now.

The man leaning in front of me had a dull expression, a pretty hard one to read in fact. His hair was long, ending at the bottom of his ears. He had a scruff, but the most appealing thing was that bionic hand of his. His left arm was completely metal, with a red star on its shoulder.

You could say that I was scared.

But I was also fascinated.

Something seemed oddly familiar about this man, his facial features just had to be tweaked a bit and he'd look like someone I knew. I decided that it was impossible, and pushed the thought away. Besides, I wasn't even entirely sure. I was supposed to be intimidated by this guy, not checking him out – not trying to find some kind of similarity towards him.

"It's a woman," he finally said, looking right at me. I was in a different room now, some sort of lab. A man in a white lab coat stood with his back facing me, rummaging around to find his stuff.

"Well of course it is," the man in the lab coat said, "Haven't you seen a woman before?"

The one staring at me didn't reply to his snarky question, but rather full on ignored it. I could see that he had some kind of pained expression behind his eyes, and all I could really do was look at him.

But then he looked away.

"пугая женщин не является актом рыцарства," (Scaring women is not an act of chivalry.) he said, staring at the ground for a few moments. I could see he clenched his jaw, and that his eyebrow furrowed.

"What would you know about chivalry? You are an assassin," the white lab coat man spat. He shook his head, finally turning around to look at me.

"She has awaken," he said, "You did not think of telling me?" he asked him, looking over at him angrily. The metal-armed man glared at the scientist.

"Я мог убить тебя прямо в вашей лаборатории," (I could kill you right here, in your lab) he told him with a different tone. The scientist rolled his eyes.

"Oh, The Winter Soldier, so frightening. You would not dare."

_Shit. _

The Winter Soldier. The man with the metal arm was the Winter Soldier, the one that I wondered about over weeks. The man I was trying to get a lead on.

Things became even more interesting.

"Hello, Ms. My name is Artyom Vsevolod, I'm here to make you feel better," he said.

it wasn't like I could say anything, so I just stared back.

"You do not understand now, Meadow Marsden, but you are many things. And extraordinary is one of them. You are such a magnificent creature," he said, like he was intrigued about my mere existence. His eyebrows knit together, bewildered over why my expression hadn't changed. At this point, I wasn't sure whether taking off the duck-tape would be a good idea.

I was relieved when an alarm went off, and Vsevolod's head turned quickly around as he cursed and got up. what is the matter?" He screamed at the Winter Soldier.

He didn't hesitate to reply. "They know that I am here. Tony Stark is still alive as well, he was taken captive by Aldrich Killian but then escaped. The world knows he is alive." He was surprisingly calm about all this. I wondered why, was he even evil?

I realised that this must be HYDRA. I didn't want to make any assumptions, but that's what I decided on.

"You must leave. Go see him, I will have to continue this another day." I could tell that Vsevolod was unhappy about this when he looked back at me and sneered.

"i will learn your secrets soon, Marsden."

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**PREVIEW**: With several gunshots heard over head, I knew I needed to find myself some safety. I needed to escape - this was my best chance. HYDRA was under attack.


	5. Chapter 5: Guilt

**Thanks a bunch for the reviews again! I cannot explain to you how happy they make me :) I love to hear your thoughts. **

**This next chapter will be more action than anything, and a teensy bit of fluff at the end with Bucky and Meadow. I might just update twice today because I'm excited to write what happens next, after this chapter.**

**Cheers - **

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**Five. **

I didn't go to sleep that time.

I was frightened of what they'd do to me. The Winter Soldier was gone now, but I still had a feeling that I was being watched by Vsevolod. I didn't quite understand how I was extraordinary, but in a way I didn't care.

My sneakers were set aside next to me, and I was stuck on the chair again. This time it was tighter - they didn't want me escaping anytime soon.

My stomach growled, and I frowned.

_I don't have time for this,_ I wanted to say.

The door swung open, and I heard a raucous outside. I could hear some marching, some screaming. Curious, I leaned back in the chair, but was pushed forward instead. At that moment I really wished I could say something.

Whoever had gone through the room waited behind me, breathing heavily. He then came into view, and the Winter Soldier stared back at me.

"I'm getting you out of here," he simply said, taking out a knife from his boot and cutting the rope quickly. My arm broke free, and I slowly took off the duck-tape.

Bewilderment overwhelmed me. What the hell was going on?

I wasn't sure if I could trust this guy. I remembered the almost-guilty look he had on his face when he saw me strapped onto the chair, squirming around.

"Why?" I asked. Although I was grateful, I was just curious of why he was helping me.

"It's dangerous for you to be here," he said, "Follow me."

I pushed the rope off me and slipped my shoes back on. The soldier made his way towards the door, opening it up to see if anyone was there. The alarm was screaming, and people continued to run. It was still chaotic.

With nothing else but a gesture, I followed him out the door, keeping my head low to make sure no one saw us. The alarm was already on, and something weird was happening. Was HYDRA under attack, I wanted to ask him, but I wasn't sure if I could say anything without him wanting to kill me.

"Duck," I heard him say urgently as we took another turn into a hallway. I did as I was told, and he dragged me into another doorway, closing it behind him.

It was dark, I wasn't really sure what was going on. His hand was on my mouth, keeping me from breathing to loud.

The alarm then shut off.

My head was leaned against his chest, so I couldn't see what was happening outside.

"Quiet," I heard him say as I tried to turn around.

"Where is he? Where is the Winter Soldier?!" Someone scream from outside. "Don't let him get away – he hasn't been cleared for over a month!"

The Winter Soldier removed his hand from my mouth, but his bionic hand continued to force me against his chest. Then he shushed me.

I heard a faint beeping noise.

My heart leaped as he grabbed my shoulders and fell back.

I heard a huge explosion overhead, and I fell against him with a thud. Scrambling to get up, I could see that the room we were in – well, wasn't a room anymore.

"Come on!" He said, scrambling to get up. He grabbed my hand and we both took a run for it, the HYDRA agents calling from behind, "He's got the girl! The Winter Soldier has taken the captive!"

My heart beat loudly against my chest, and my thighs ached as I continued to run with him. He was fast, though, and I wasn't sure if I could continue running.

We finally made it outside, and that was when I started to hear bullets whiz past my ear. The Winter Soldier looked back, concern almost flashing through his blue eyes.

"бросить гранату!"

An explosion.

"получить эту чертову скипетр!"

The noises then all stopped.

We found ourselves hiding behind a building. I couldn't see any snipers, and I leaned against the wall to catch my breath. With several gunshots heard over head, I knew I needed to find myself some safety. I needed to escape - this was my best chance. HYDRA was under attack.

The Winter Soldier wasn't leaning against the building, he looked like he was tired but he was only panting just a bit. He looked back behind the building, trying to eye anymore snipers. We were on the edge HYDRA's headquarters borderline. Just a few yards above us was the fence. That was the one last thing that we needed to get through to get out of here.

How were we going to do that unnoticed?

I finally caught my breath and looked over at him. He looked awfully a lot like… no, it wasn't him.

"Do you know Bucky Barnes?" I finally blurted out. He didn't seem to hear me for the first couple of seconds, but then swung his head back, confusion written all over his face.

"What?"

"Bucky Barnes, you know. The Howling Commando? The only one to give his life in World War 2?" I explained. Although it didn't help much, it just made the expression on his face worse.

"I-I don't know..." he shook his head, "We have to get out of here," he said. I could still se that he was confused, and half hoped that he wasn't angry. I realised that there was only one thing on his mind right now, and that it should be the only thing on mind as well.

I shrugged the thought aside. Did he even know his own name?

I couldn't hear anything anymore. It was completely silent, there wasn't much yelling and the bullets completely stopped coming.

"How are we going to get over that fence?" I asked him.

He thought for a moment, as did I. There was no possible way we could get through that fence unless it opened itself. It was towering, too tall to climb. But it was heavily guarded as well. We needed a distraction.

"Listen to me," he said, "I came out here to get you. I came here to save you." He looked at me like he was trying to get me to agree with him on something.

"Yeah," I said, "I know… but what about the fe – "

"I know how to get it open. But you have to go when it opens, okay? No looking back."

I wanted to know why he was doing this. I had no idea who he was, only that he was sympathetic enough to ruin his own job just to get me out of HYDRA's base.

"Why are you doing this?" I asked again. I wanted to know right before I ran through that fence, because there was a high chance that we might get separated.

He only stared at me, like he was trying to find his words. Like he was trying to tell me something. He looked an awful lot like Bucky.

"I can't remember," he said with a pained expression. "Something just told me to help you. Just run, ok? Get through this." his blue eyes bored into mine. For the first time I could see emotion behind them. I had a bad feeling in my stomach now, the guilt started to eat away at me.

He was confused. He needed help. I felt so bad, he was sacrificing so much. I didn't want to go, I didn't want to just leave him behind. I didn't even know what HYDRA needed him for. What were they even doing to him?

"Thank you," I finally breathed out, and gave a smile to him. I saw the edge of his lips curl up slightly back at me. With that I watched as he turned around and ran straight into the field without looking back. His speed was incredible.

I heard gunshots being fired and several screams. I shut my eyes. I couldn't look at this, I couldn't see him fall.

The gate opened.

I took a run for it.

I couldn't hear anything behind me, only a bunch of footsteps following me. I didn't dare look back, just like he told me to. I just ran until I reached the gate, and I felt a bullet whiz past my ear again.

Even though the pain stung against my temple, I urged myself on to continue running. I wasn't going to get dizzy, I was going to get out of here.

The gate started to close again.

My heart leaped in my throat, and I further accelerated my running. I needed to get out of here, he wouldn't just fall for nothing.

I slid down, just nearly making it, and the gate closed loudly behind me.

I tried to catch my breath, slowing my pace just a little bit.

That was the beginning of when the guilt started to eat away at me. Instead of butterflies, there were moths that were fluttering in my stomach. I balanced my breathing.

"Shit," I said. "Fuck, I can't just leave him in there."

* * *

**PREVIEW: **I ignored the dizzy-ness. I was sick of being dizzy. I was sick of being hopeless. People needed to stop saving me. No, now I saved them.


	6. Chapter 6: Revenge

**_5/10/14: Edited._**

**_Cheers - _**

* * *

**Six. **

_Hail Hydra._

The two words that brought chills to my spine.

_Hail Hydra._

The two words that I'm the most scared of.

_316 days in slumber_

I woke with a start, heart pounding loudly in my chest. I was sweating like crazy, my hair disheveled as I kept a firm grip on my blanket. I was panting, but it wasn't as bad as it usually is.

My nightmares had started ever since the incident with the Winter Soldier.

I didn't realise how long that I was sleeping until I finally asked Dr. Banner, who I met back when SHIELD found me and took me in once more. They had told me that the microchip wasn't in my body anymore – or at least the x-rays couldn't find it. I tried to explain to Banner that the microchip had to be the only reason why I couldn't wake up, but that didn't work. Banner didn't understand it as I did, and he had work to do. I felt a bit guilty for pushing him to find out what was wrong with me, so I eventually left him alone.

The year after I joined the strategic homeland intervention, enforcement and logistics division. I wasn't much of a fighter, so I mostly just helped around in the helicarrier. Fury was more than happy to let me in, possibly because I wasn't supposed to know what SHIELD agents did. Because I had already been inside of the Triskelion, SHIELD's headquarters, Fury had no other choice.

What SHIELD didn't know was that I was doing research on the Winter Soldier behind their back. I didn't know who I could trust, not until a couple weeks later I got a partner, Alphonse Ignetos.

Al was one of those people who looked scary from afar, probably because of the stern look on his face. But once you get to know him, you realise that he's a total idiot.

Al has this weird obsession over clocks. Every mission we've been to, he's always admiring the clocks. I don't think I've ever had a conversation where he didn't mention them. I didn't really understand why, but whenever you brought the subject up Al could never stop talking about how great the structure and ticking and invention a clock was.

The downside was that he had a thing with smoking. He tried to quit a couple of years back after his wife died, but couldn't help it. He got low, lost custody over his daughter. He brought up a lot of disputes among people, started street fights. That was when finally SHIELD found him.

It took a while but I eventually got used to Al's personality. When he first got into SHIELD, he acted as everything was fine. He smoked. He drank. He did anything to lose the pain. I was the only one who really knew that he was still broken, but I never brought it up because Al wasn't one of those people who liked to talk about his feelings. Most of the times I knew that he was lying, but he liked to be left alone. I started to understand him, and we became a bit close.

My first mission consisted of finding Natasha Romanoff, who had disappeared for a week. It was March 16, 2014, and Fury needed me to come in and find her. I guess that's what you could say what my job was: to befriend agents and bring them in when they were needed.

Romanoff was off-duty, but SHIELD lost her. She was really good at hiding, I realised, but I was good at finding things.

Because of this, I had put the Winter Soldier project down for a bit. Alphonse was supposed to join me, but the brunette decided to stay back and let me handle this one. No biggey – I was better of alone anyways. Although he was my partner, communicating during a mission was one thing that we slacked off on.

I arrive at an abandoned subway station, my light brown eyes scanning the room for any kind of sign that would lead me further to where I needed to go. I wasn't entirely sure that this was the exact place I needed to be, but I had come all this way so I let myself take a look around.

My footsteps echo in the halls and I hear water dripping from afar. It's awfully quiet, and frankly I fear how peaceful and silent it is.

I make my way down the railroad tracks, my fingers tracing the graffiti printed delinquently against the walls. I've always admired graffiti, it was such a shame that it was illegal though. There weren't as many as I continued down the hall. It only got darker.

I eventually had to take out my phone to examine the place as I got deeper and deeper into the hall. If this was happening 316 days before, I would've fainted by now. I remembered the day where I had escaped HYDRA headquarters, the events that happened afterward. The endless physical and mental pain both.

Bucky Barnes was the Winter Soldier.

I knew it. At least, I realised it a while later, but I tried to deny it. There wasn't any way, he would've been at least 95 years old – right? Unless he was frozen just like Steve was, which I highly doubted. It always brought me a headache.

I remembered effects of the day where I had escaped HYDRA.

* * *

_There was always that endless sounds of nonexistent footsteps following me and that terrible feeling of guilt stuck in my chest. But worse of all, the nightmares. _

_I didn't think I'd have any. It was one day, and it wasn't even that long. I didn't even look at him fall to the ground when he saved me, I only hear screams and gunshots. So why was this effecting me so much? I hated this feeling, I needed to get rid of it. I hated knowing that I was the reason why someone who didn't even know me, someone who helped me, died because there was just a feeling in his gut to do so. I hated that feeling._

_I was angry._

_After several days of thinking about it, it was almost unbelievable that HYDRA was still manipulating SHIELD. There was no possible way they could've lasted that long and not get caught. _

_I almost felt like I was a target because I knew they were up to something. No - I knew I was a target. I escaped them, there was not other explanation. _

_Then after several of weeks of thinking about it, it was almost unbelievable that Bucky Barnes was still alive. I had the same feeling towards Steve, but Bucky? That was one to many, right?_

_Just knowing that a Howling Commando died twice for an important cause made the feeling in my stomach worsen. I couldn't live with this grudge._

_I ignored the dizzy-ness. I was sick of being dizzy. I was sick of being hopeless. People needed to stop saving me. No, now I saved them._

_I had to avenge him. _

* * *

**_PREVIEW:_**I glared up at Alphonse, who just stuck his tongue at me.

"You're a complete idiot," I said, raising my eyebrow at him.

"I may be, but you've got to admit - this is a spectacular idea. I'm up and ready to get turntable at this club."


	7. Chapter 7: Natasha

**I'll be adding another OC, but I promise he wont be annoying. Anyways, there are a couple of references in this chapter. Please review! I didn't get any last time. **

* * *

**Seven. **

_316 days in slumber_

_March 16, 2014_

"If you were searching for me, I'd have to say that I'm quite impressed," I heard a voice behind me say. I didn't need to turn around to see who it was.

"Frankly, I'm impressed with myself as well. I didn't know I could actually track down the infamous Black Widow," I paused, "speaking of which – why did you go into hiding?" I turned around by then. Natasha was leaning against the wall casually wearing jeans and a hoodie. I made my way back to the opening, where the light was seeping through, so I could see her entirely.

"I wasn't hiding," she said, licking her lips. "I was hiding someone."

I didn't need to ask who she was hiding. SHIELD was certain that after two years, Clint would be alright. But I trusted Natasha. She knew that he wasn't, so I wasn't going to push it.

I didn't need to ask her to figure it out, because after that she said:

"We got off on the wrong start. He was compromised, couldn't trust himself. 'Just good at pushing people away."

Natasha always has a way of surprising me. It was rare for her and her partner to fight, so I knew something was wrong. It was obvious that the only reason why I found her was because she was ready to be found. It was obvious that she walked away from Clint – who was still suffering from New York.

I felt bad for him in a way, because everyone back at the Triskelion kept talking about how he was weak. I didn't completely understand what he was going through, but I looked up to Natasha and if she knew what she was doing hiding him away then that meant that Barton was still scared. And it was hard to scare Barton.

"You know where he is?" I asked.

"Yeah," she said. "He doesn't want to be found. But it's for the best – SHIELD should just leave him alone."

"So what's your story? What have you been doing for the past 2 years?" I asked. If she wasn't going to give Barton away, SHIELD wasn't going to force her. But still, she needed an excuse. The only way was to lie and tell them that she was doing something else rather than helping Barton hide from them.

"Hawaii. I was tracking down Milo Evans. Truly, I was doing that for the past month but that was when you were assigned into finding me. I thought I'd cut you a brake," she licked her lips, looking left.

That was a lie.

Natasha and I had created this system last year back when we were forced to work together because of Fury's orders. If Nat licked her lips and looked left, that meant either two things: we were being watched, or someone had betrayed us.

I gave a slight nod, telling her that I got the memo, and said, "We should be getting you back to headquarters, then."

* * *

Natasha and I aren't really close. We've only been assigned to a couple of mission together, but I've never really got the chance to get to know her. Although when it comes to Barton, I know how they feel about each other. Clint Barton saved Natasha, and she repeatedly believes that she owes him a debt. Of course, she does, but in a way Natasha saved Clint too.

It was back in '13, close to the incident with the Dark Elves and Thor when Natasha was sent on a mission to Algeria. I was ordered to stay back and help her walk through the place, with a holographic map of the dungeon that she was ordered to walk through. I didn't get all the details because in the middle of the mission, communications were tinkered with.

I knew it was about to happen, so we gathered an extraction team to get her out. When it came to Natasha and Clint, they never needed an extraction team, but Natasha let down some hints to tell me that she was going to go rouge for a bit.

I never got to know what Natasha was doing, but I knew it had something to do with HYDRA. I had no idea what they were doing in Algeria, but I knew that it was something important and ever since that day I had been waiting for Tasha to tell me what the hell happened that day. She was one of the few people who knew about the Winter Soldier. Half the time I didn't think she believed me, like Bruce, but I knew that I could trust her.

The only problem was that I didn't know if she could trust me.

What had happened next proved that we weren't just acquaintances, but friends.

"It's HYDRA," Nat said as we got on the train, "I think something's happening within SHIELD and HYDRA has something to do with it."

It almost scared me that I was excited. I hadn't been on an intense mission for a while, and just hearing the name HYDRA made me curious. I hated HYDRA more than anything, but they were the enemy that I was up against at all times.

"Trust no one," Natasha said, her eyes narrowed straight up ahead. "Don't tell anyone anything. Not unless you know every single thing about them. Stay away from Rumlow."

I didn't need to be told twice.

I never really liked Rumlow anyways.

But this started to scare me. There was a hint of fear in Natasha's voice, and The Black Widow was never scared of anything.

Something was up. Something was going on between HYDRA and SHIELD, and I was going to figure out what.

"They used me before," I said, "They're not going to get away with it."

Natasha didn't reply to that. Instead, her eyebrows furrowed like she was trying to listen to something.

I didn't ask until we got off the train, heading towards the Triskelion. It was only a couple of meters away, but that didn't keep a café from blowing up two blocks down.

We heard a loud rumble, and then another sound of explosion. Nat looked back, gave me a look of warning, and ran towards the sound – and I followed right behind.

The café was burning down by then, people were safely out, coughing their lungs out and thanking Natasha and I. The smell of smoke reminded me of HYDRA's base, and I shut my eyes to forget that happened.

"It's an act of terrorism. Thankfully, no one got hurt, but this is close to the Triskelion. We need to inform Fury," I told Nat. She looked like she was about to say something, but closed her mouth when she saw something behind me.

"Look's like he already knows," Someone whispered behind me, and I jumped.

I looked up to see Alphonse, his brunette hair a mess and several burns up his arms. He was grinning crazily down at me.

"Al," I said, "the hell you've been?"

"Could've asked the same question. I'm leaving in two days to Hawaii, something about a guy named Evans," he said. "I'm planning to get super drunk and cross dress so he thinks I'm sexy and I'll try to seduce him."

I glared up at Alphonse, who just stuck his tongue at me.

"You're a complete idiot," I said, raising my eyebrow at him.

"I may be, but you've got to admit - this is a spectacular idea. I'm up and ready to get turntable at this club."

Natasha wasn't listening anymore, she was making her way down the street back to the Triskelion. Without another word to Alphonse, I followed her. I didn't need to tell him that I wanted him to join me.

I felt like I hadn't seen Al in such a long time. He had changed a bit ever since Algeria, and when I asked him why he never really told me. He wasn't helping out with the mission. In fact, he disappeared for a few weeks after it.

"Evans, right?" I asked Al, who just grunted behind me. "Tasha, weren't you trying to track him down?"

"Yep," she said, pausing. "Decided it was a waste of time. Hawaii was great, though."

It was kind of funny how Al got a mission that Nat would usually do, but I ignored it and stayed silent until we got to headquarters.

Al looked up, smirking a bit.

"Well, here goes two days of wasting time."

* * *

**PREVIEW: **Something was wrong with Al. It wasn't a negative thing, it was completely positive. I just didn't understand why he wouldn't tell me, we were partners - we were close, right? I hated that he only asked me for help when he was either drunk or was acting like a child.

"Al," I said, "No more secrets."


	8. Chapter 8: The Fifth

**Reviews would be awesome, you know. (hint, hint nudge, nudge).. And I hit 1,000 views! Woohooo thanks a bunch guys!**

**Cheers - **

* * *

**Eight. **

_317 days in slumber_

_March 17, 2014. 10:00 PM _

There was a loud sound outside of my room, which made me force my eyes open. It was another habit that I had – my reflexes were kind of all over the place. I guess it was because I tend to be curious about almost everything.

I was exhausted, I promised myself that I'd go to sleep because I didn't want to waste time waking up right before my trip to Hawaii with Alphonse.

I wondered why Fury hadn't called us in for a debriefing today. We were told that we were assigned to Hawaii, but that was yesterday. I didn't want to sleep because I had this paranoia that Fury would call me while I was resting. But we all knew that he didn't start doing that until you were level 5 or 6. I was only level 4.

I rolled off my bed, every bone in my body aching. I was about to stroll into the bathroom when I heard a knock on the door.

"Coming," I groaned out, tying my hair up and making my way towards the door.

Natasha stood there, one hand on her hip with her eyebrow raised. I realised that Alphonse told me to get a lot of sleep, and I was still in my SHIELD uniform at 10:00.

"No sleep?"

"Tried. I was being paranoid. You know, usual things." Truthfully I was hoping that Fury would call someone in to pick me for the debriefing, so I didn't have to wake up earlier the next day. If he debriefed us tomorrow, I'd have to wake up earlier to get my stuff ready. I was only level 4, Fury never allowed me on the field. But if I wanted to go up a level I needed to be on time all the time.

"Sleeping in that?" Nat asked. "Whatever, Fury wants you up in 10. He thought you'd be sleeping."

I knew that he knew I wasn't sleeping, because if I was my lights wouldn't have been open. That and he could search my internet browsing history from his office so he'd know if I was online or not. Because I'm being monitored, the only thing I really do is watch on Netflix.

"'Might be there earlier," I said, "I only hoped that debriefing was tomorrow. I didn't think he's ask to see me now."

Natasha looked away like she was about to say something. I could tell that Fury had interrupted her as well, because she wore a red hoodie and sweatpants, her hair tied up as well. I could tell she just came back from the gym.

She opened her mouth to say something, but was interrupted when a man behind her said, "Time's been cutoff. Director Fury needs them in five."

That was then I realised something was wrong. Nat had suspected it, and I was only realizing it now. Questions overwhelmed my head, was it about the mission? Was it something about the bomb attack yesterday? May be it was about Alphonse?

When you hang around in SHIELD you kind of get this vibe that everyone in the helicarrier or the Triskelion is watching your every move. Like they'll judge you like a bunch of highschoolers if you get one thing wrong. Fury may only have one eye, but he doesn't treat you like children. Fury's one of those people who you need to impress, but you can't seem pretentious in any costs or not only Fury will notice, but other people will too.

A friend had once told me that the only way to go up a level is earning it, by not doing something because of yourself, but doing something because it's right. I thought I understood it fully back when he told me, but it didn't affect me until I watched other agents fall in mortification when they tried to better themselves just to go up a level. SHIELD was supposed to teach you how to believe in what's right, it was supposed to save people. It made me mad when the agents around me only yearned to reach success. I joined SHIELD to help people, I joined SHIELD to protect people. Just like Bucky did a year ago.

I was ready in three minutes, mostly because I wasn't sleeping. Alphonse was 3 minutes later, but Fury didn't mind because he was level 6. That and Alphonse tends to be fashionably late, for some reason he believes that it's "overly sexy" and that "it'll get me girls from linguistics". I didn't bother telling him that debriefing is only between the people on the mission and Fury.

"Sir," I said as I walked in. I tried to keep a confident face, but honestly I was scared than anything. I haven't had a true mission in a month, and Fury and I both knew that finding Natasha wasn't going to be hard once she heard that SHIELD was looking for her.

Fury kept his back towards me, and just nodded a reply. I waited for Al to come in, and when he did his hair was a complete mess.

Typical Al.

"Morning Director," he said, running his hands through his hair. "Or should I say midnight?"

"If you don't want to lose an eye like I did, I recommend you sit your sorry ass down, Agent Ignetos," Fury said. I pinched myself to keep from laughing. Fury was harsh on us, but the way he said things were just so gold.

"I think it's kind of funny how you say that. Agent Ignetos… sounds kinda like Doritos," Al said, giving me a crooked smile and sitting down. Fury ignored the comment.

He turned around then, facing both of us with his hands on his hips. The look of concern when he gazed over at Al wasn't something usual – something was up.

"Agent Ignetos I'm putting you off the mission," he finally said, leaning back on his desk. I looked up to Fury, eyebrows furrowed. If he wasn't going into the field, then who was?

"What? Is it because of the Dorito thing? Come on, Director – even you have to admit SHIELD revolves around Doritoes. Even Cap looks like one. With all that muscle? Definitely a Dorito," he said. His voice had a hint of relief in them, which confused me. Usually Al would be devastated if a chance like this slipped out of his hands. He'd love to hula with a bunch of girls.

"Not quite. I've got a solo mission for you, Ignetos. Marsden, you're still on. You'll be accompanied by Agent Caravyl."

Oh, great.

Hugh Caravyl was one of those people that you want to look up to, but after a week of working with him you get let down. Caravyl was a total drunk who didn't know what he was doing. He was one of those people that do anything to go up a rank, and that's what made me despise him so much. I'd say he's like Tony Stark, but Tony's actually _smart. _Hugh on the other hand didn't care about anyone but himself.

"Director Fury, might I ask – "

" – No, Agent Marsden. Caravyl won't be the one going in the field don't worry," he cut off, "Because you are. Welcome to level 5."

* * *

As we made our way back to our rooms, I couldn't help but see Al look frustrated with something. I wanted to assume that it was the mission, but I knew that wasn't it. In fact, Al was overjoyed when I got up a rank.

Something was wrong with Al. It wasn't a negative thing, it was completely positive. I just didn't understand why he wouldn't tell me, we were partners - we were close, right? I hated that he only asked me for help when he was either drunk or was acting like a child.

"Al," I said, "No more secrets."

He turned around with an expression on his face that literally read 'hah, don't tell me what to do because I'm still one level ahead of you'.

But when he saw that I was serious, he wiped his face with a smile.

"What's up, when are you going to tell me?" I asked, crossing my arms. This was getting annoying.

"Nothing, I just really wished I could cross dress. You know, if I never got into SHIELD I'd bet you a 50% that I'd be either a male stripper or a gay cosplayer."

I couldn't help it, I laughed.

"You're a child, Ignetos."

"Aw, you know me so well," he said, grinning up at me.

He was a child that wouldn't tell his friends what hurt him, because he was too scared that the thing that hurt him would hurt them too. I fully understood him, not because of observations of when he sat there in the cafeteria wolfing down a hamburger. But because of observations of when he was at the gym blowing off some steam, observations of him when he'd pack a picture frame of his daughter in the suitcase right before a mission.

"Fury let me off that mission for a reason," he said. "I don't know why but there's a reason and I'm starting to become suspicious."

"I completely agree with you," I said. And I did. Ever since Natasha told me that something was off, I couldn't help but feel scared every single time I was walking down the halls. HYDRA was watching us. I remembered when she told me not to trust anyone. Did that mean my own partner too?

"Meadow, I'm in love," he finally said, blushing a bit. I couldn't help it, a wide grin spread across my face.

"Who's the lucky girl?" I asked, almost jumping up and down. I reminded myself to stay cool, because that's what Al was comfortable with.

"She doesn't know I'm in SHIELD. I don't think I should tell her. If I did, she'd know that I'm going into danger every day," I understood him. He didn't want her to worry. "Besides," he continued, "We're not even dating yet. I'm not sure what it is."

I smiled to myself. I was glad that Al had finally gotten over his wife. Of course he still had his daughter whom he never saw to remind him of her, but he moved on. That was good.

"Oh and Marsden?" He said as he went up to his room.

"Good luck."

* * *

**PREVIEW: **Find the captive. Retrieve the captive. Get captive to safety. Oh, and don't die. This didn't seem that hard, right?

**Sorry that the story's taking so long to start off. I promise they'll be more Bucky. I love you guys and your patience. Don't forget to review!**


	9. Chapter 9: Trust

Nine.

**SORRY I HAVEN'T UPDATED IN LIKE FOREVER!**

**But I went on a field trip to DC and it was hella fab. I had so much fun, but I also got sick. Anyways because I haven't updated in 3 days, I made this chapter longer than usual. **

**Cheers - **

* * *

**Nine. **

_318 days in slumber._

Find the captive. Retrieve the captive. Get captive to safety. Oh, and don't die. This didn't seem that hard, right?

Wrong.

I didn't know that there was more to this mission, I never really took a while to think about it. I was more of excited to call myself a level 5 agent, excited to say that I could finally go down to the field and kick some ass.

I wasn't that good of a fighter, but I was known or having a sharp aim. Hawkeye always inspired me, but I didn't use bows and arrows. I was more comfortable with a gun.

When it came to hand-to-hand combat I guess you could say I was alright at fighting. I knew the basics, but I couldn't go up against Romanoff if my life depended on it. I wasn't physically fast, but my mind moved fast. The only problem was that I saw an opening, but I think twice before using it to my advantage.

I was walking through the halls to the debriefing when Natasha stopped me. My heart jumped, but when I realised it was her, I calmed myself down.

"I've got to tell you something," she almost whispered, looking around to make sure no one was around.

"Is this about my mission?" I asked.

"Yeah," she said, "Or at least why your own partner isn't on your mission. How long do you have?" She asked. I took a glance at my watch.

"I've got five. Make it quick, this better be important." Natasha smirked. She knew that the only reason why I didn't want to be late to my first debriefing as a level 5 was because I wanted to show Fury how grateful I was.

"You can be fashionably late now, you do realise," she said, "You're known for one of SHIELD's top agents. Maybe you're not as good in the field as you are on a computer."

I wanted to say 'Geez Nat, thanks a bunch', but I wasn't feeling it today. Truthfully I was devastated that Al wasn't on the job with me. If he was we'd both be in the field, and you never know that might be better than what we usually are like.

"Anyways, the reason why Al's not on the mission is kind of because SHIELD doesn't feel like he'll be able to contain himself," she explained. I narrowed my eyes at her. What the hell was that even supposed to mean?

"You're calling him weak? Honestly, he's stronger than me." I wouldn't usually give Al a compliment, he's already full of them. But I didn't want SHIELD to be degrading one of their top agents. I wasn't even that good, I was pretty good with codes and hacking into stuff, but other than that I wouldn't consider myself as a top agent.

It was probably because I was moved up to level 5 in such a short amount of time. I didn't understand how that worked, because I was only in SHIELD for a year. I didn't want to be paranoid, because I kept telling myself that I was paranoid for a while.

"Not weak, just not fit for the job…" Natasha sighed. "Alright," she started, "You can't say anything about what I'm about to tell you. It's completely classified." I nodded.

I just wanted to know what the _hell_ was going on.

"The problem is… Milo Evans killed Al's wife."

I stared at Natasha.

"Wait… What?"

"Stay with me," she said, "We've only got five minutes. Milo Evans killed Al's wife. If Alphonse ever finds that out, he might hit his lowest point. Being his partner, it's your responsibility to make sure that that doesn't happen."

I wasn't sure whether I was angry at Natasha for asking me to keep this promise or confused about Milo Evans. SHIELD had told us that the man that killed Al's wife was dead, that he took a cyanide pill after murdering her. I had mixed emotions.

"So you're telling me that SHIELD lied to him about this whole entire mission? About what had actually happened to the woman that he loved?"

Natasha didn't flinch at the harshness of my voice. She just looked at me sadly, nodding. "But it was because SHIELD didn't want Alphonse to go and do something that he'd regret later on in his life. You've got to understand, Meadow – "

" – You know what? I'm not sure I can even trust anyone anymore. The last person I tried to help died in front of me. I just need to know who Al can trust, because you know what I do feel responsible for him. Al's one of my best friends, and he just recently found someone. I just want to make sure that with this new piece of evidence that Fury may be a complete and total ass doesn't affect him in any ways, because it took so long for him to recover after her death," I told Natasha, looking at her dead straight in the eyes. Natasha only stared back, her expression almost emotionless.

"I understand that you're angry, Meadow. But you've got to be in this with us. Without your promise to never tell him what had actually happened that night, SHIELD's not sure that they can add you to the list of people that we can trust. So I ask you this now… Can we trust you?"

I wasn't sure what to say. I wasn't sure if I could trust SHIELD. I was always convinced that SHIELD were the good guys, that SHIELD was an organization that helped people. But then I remembered the only reason why I joined SHIELD was because a Howling Commando that I was sure who died saved my life. That he took so many risks, and that I was ready to do the same.

"You can trust me," I said, "But you've got to tell me everything."

I can't say that I wasn't taking a risk, because at the time I always had a doubt over SHIELD. There was a lot of things that I didn't know, and I knew that I couldn't know every single thing because I was level 5. The only way to be informed things is to win trust, and the only way to do that was to be certain that you could trust the thing you wanted back. I didn't know that at the time.

"Good." Nat said, "Now you're probably going to get angry at what I'm going to say next…" She paused, and I raised an eyebrow. "The woman that Al's going after right now is an undercover agent. She's making sure that he doesn't try to go after Evans if he ever does find out what he did. The chances of that are high."

I nodded. Surprisingly even to myself I wasn't as angry. There was a reason for that, and in a way I wanted to protect Al from revenge as well. Revenge could do a lot of terrible things with you, mess up your mind – make you the monster that you'd never expect to be. That was one thing I needed to do: Save people from becoming what they fear.

_319 days in slumber_

With a thud, I shot open my eyes to a calm setting. I wasn't sure where I was at first, but when I saw Caravyl with his grim expression looking down at me.

"You went to sleep," he said.

"Damn, you're observant," I muttered, unstrapping my seatbelt and rubbing my eyes. We had landed in Hawaii, I could tell because out of the window it looked so much more different than New York. That and Caravyl looked impatient, like he just wanted the mission to be over with.

"I wasn't allowed to skydive off like a badass?" I asked, smirking over to Caravyl. He shrugged.

"You've just turned level 5. That doesn't mean that you can do whatever Captain America does."

"And you're an ass. That doesn't mean that you _should_ be able to do whatever you want," I shot back. He was _not_ going to degrade me. Not after totally letting me down after I found out what kind of person that he really was.

With a grunt, Caravyl unstrapped his seatbelt too, and strutted out of the room. I assumed that he went out to the control room, because that's where he was supposed to sit.

I was about to follow him, but decided not to. I needed to get ready – I needed weapons.

It took about ten minutes to sort everything out, to pass as a mere tourist that was interested in the cultures of people that lived on Hawaii. I was ready to kick ass. I was ready to find Evans.

"Agent Marsden?" I heard from behind me, right before I was about to leave, "You're going to need this."

The agent handed me a pair of sunglasses.

"It's going to be sunny," he said, and smiled as he ran off. I raised my eyebrow, slipping them on.

Immediately letters appeared in front of my eyes, showing me how to contact everyone and how to do so. There were several apps – night vision, selective guide, bio contact. I didn't realise how wide I was grinning until Caravyl walked up to me.

"You ready?" he asked, leaning against the wall. I lifted up the sunglasses, nodding.

"I'm up for this."

Hawaii was beautiful. It was warm, sunny, almost an ideal place for everyone. The people there were incredibly nice, I got at least five free things from the dealers that stood on the streets.

But the first thing I needed was to figure out what name Evans was going as. I had a facial recognition app on the sunglasses that was sent from Al to aid me, so I didn't think that it would be a problem. I didn't realise where I was going to start searching, though.

I walked into a bar that was filled up almost completely. It was unusually dark, but I decided that since it was a crowded place it would be easy to blend in. Right before I was about to take my sunglasses off, I got a message from Al.

_Call me when you've got the chance. It's enormously urgent. Can't trust anyone. _

With a heartbeat I ran out of the bar and leaned against the back door, plugging in my cellphone and calling Al.

"What's up?" I asked, terrified that he found out about the actual reason for my mission. I could feel my heart beating quickly, and I was starting to get another headache.

"It's about my mission. I did a background check on the target. He has something to do with my daughter," I heard him whisper from the other side. I furrowed my eyebrows.

"What are you talking about?"

"I'm talking about my target. Isn't it weird that he happens to be my daughter's teacher? SHIELD is setting us up. Either they haven't done a background check on everything or they're trying to lure me out before I do something stupid."

"You're not making sense. If this guy's a teacher then how is he a criminal?" I asked. I didn't get how he figured that out instead of his wife's murderer.

"you've got to listen to me," he whispered, "Lonsky went into hiding. He was the terrorist that blew up the café a couple of days ago. I have no idea how he ended up here, but he's got to do something with HYDRA. You're not safe in Hawaii. You've got to get out," He tried to explain. This didn't make any sense.

"Why are you whispering? What do you mean SHIELD sent you on a mission that related to your daughter? I thought SHIELD said that they wouldn't send you on any missions – "

I was cut off by an explosion overhead.

"Shit, Marsden what the hell was that?" I heard Al ask from the other side. My heart started beating even more quickly, and I got off the back door.

"Listen, something's happening, I'm going to check on it but I can't be talking. Don't you _dare_hang up."

Al just grunted a response, and I ran out into the opening.

Everything was on fire.

There was another loud sound, and I ducked down before I was caught into the other explosion. I felt a sharp pain against my arm and it wasn't until later that I realised that I was burned.

I looked up to see what was happening, when I felt like my heart stopped.

"Marsden what's going on?!" Al screamed this time, but I couldn't say anything.

Because the man that was standing right in front of the explosion was a man with a bionic arm, an AK 47 gripped in his hand.

Because that man had pointed it right at me, and I couldn't move when he pulled the trigger.

* * *

**PREVIEW:** There were sounds everywhere, I couldn't really see what was going on around me. I felt dizzy and like I was about to throw up. It wasn't until I raised my hand that I felt the wound on my shoulder, pain screaming at me.

**(A/N: Please don't hate me for that ending.)**


	10. Chapter 10: Things that seem

**Ten. - Things that seem**

Caravyl was a man with no patience. He knew how to get into a mission, do his job without any distractions, and get out. He was getting angry, mostly towards Fury for making him go with a newbie that didn't know how to do anything. This wasn't what he signed up for.

But he remembered his true mission. There was a lot that was needed to be done but little time. He just didn't understand why he was told to get rid of this agent specifically.

In Hugh Caravyl's eyes, Meadow Marsden was a girl who didn't know what she was doing at all in SHIELD. The only reason why she was there was because she merely knew that SHIELD existed. It baffled him how easily that Marsden was able to reach such a high level in such short amount of time.

Time was a valuable thing, it shouldn't be used for weak agents like Marsden.

Hugh Caravyl wasn't jealous, he just knew what to give to people who were naïve.

"Caravyl," he heard his name call from above, "the cold's got her."

Caravyl frowned, "What the hell is he doing here? I told Pierce that I'd take care of it. I told him that it wasn't going to be a problem! I told him – "

" – We understand that, sir, but this wasn't ordered by Pierce," the agent then strutted down the stairs, grinning as he leaned back against the wall. "It was ordered by me."

Caravyl gave a nod, muttering an apology and backing off a bit. "I understand… _sir._"

The day was bright. The future was bright. Society was at a tipping point between order and chaos, Alexander Pierce's signature motto replayed in Caravyl's head.

It was going to happen soon. He was ready, whatever came at him.

"Are you going to kill her?" Caravyl asked.

It took a moment for Vsevolod to respond, his hands running through his dark hair and his eyes crazily jolting back and forth, like he was looking for answers in the locked series of doors in his head.

"That was the order," he said, "Kill her – get over with it."

Caravyl looked down, "But HYDRA needs her. Because she's a m – "

" – _I don't care if HYDRA needs her!"_ Artyom Vsevolod screamed at Caravyl. Caravyl tried his best not to flinch, but he knew what would happen if he made the scientist angry. The rage of his wasn't like Bruce Banner's, but it made him make incredibly big decisions.

"I am not HYDRA, they just need me. The only reason why I was helping was to get my hands on the mutant, and we find her just to figure out all those years the microchip was never able to do its job? There is no reason anymore. Do not question my orders. _Do you understand?_"

Caravyl was awfully silent after that.

Don't anger the scientist, he reminded himself.

"Yes, sir."

* * *

The afternoon I awoke was a dreadful day. The rain was pouring hard, the sky was dark and everything just seemed so dull. It was probably like that from my perspective because I had just got shot in the arm and the side of my stomach and I wasn't fully conscience. There were sounds everywhere, I couldn't really see what was going on around me. I felt dizzy and like I was about to throw up. It wasn't until I raised my hand that I felt the wound on my shoulder, pain screaming at me.

I decided not to think about my surroundings. I didn't use my scenes. I was angry, confused, frustrated, but mostly hungry. All I wanted right now was a cheese steak. No, that was a lie. All I wanted right now was to know how the Winter Soldier was alive.

_James,_ I told myself. _His name is James Buchanan Barnes. Also known as Bucky._

I remembered seeing him being shot down by a bunch of HYDRA agents. Well, I mean, not exactly _saw_ but I heard it.

I realised that I never actually looked back, and that very action might have been a tiny mistake. He had told me not to,

I remembered.

I tried to shake the thought off and get up, just try to simply figure out where I was. The fact that I had to do this almost every single time I got knocked out or went to sleep started to piss me off.

But then memories came surging at me.

This was my first mission, and I fucked up big time.

Groaning, I rolled over to my side instead, trying to ignore the terrible sting that made me want to throw up on my arm. _Shit, _I thought, _God damn that hurts. _

I remembered the gun being an AK 47. I had no idea how I was alive. That and wasn't that a sniper? Why did he shoot me with an AK 47? Marvel didn't make any sense. I decided not to think about it too much because that started to give me a headache too.

Then my thoughts went to Marvel. Was I even in Marvel? What if I made my way back home? No, that was impossible. Marvel was my home.

I was about to finally swing my legs over and move, despite my wounds, when the door swung open and I saw someone that I didn't think I'd see in a long time.

"Dad?! What the hell are you doing here?"

* * *

**PREVIEW: **"I've been wanting to see you for so long, but I was stuck here the whole time."

**A/N: I'd like to hear your thoughts. Meadow's dad MIGHT be someone from the Marvel Cinematic Universe. Can you guys guess who in the reviews?**


	11. Chapter 11: Power

**Sorry. for the short chapter. I've got state tests to do (yeah, I have to take like five of them i'm so angry. [Yes, I exaggerated that number] math sucks) so it's going to be hard to write long chapters. I'm also going to this convention which i'm so excited for on Saturday, so since I wont be able to update the chapter on Friday will be at least 2,000 words or more. Thanks so much for all the reviews!**

**Cheers - **

**Eleven.: Power**

"It's now up to you. You have full responsibility over this situation. You can either pull the plug, or wait even longer for her to wake up."

Jenna Marsden wasn't a patient woman. She wasn't a patient mother, either. In fact, the only patient here was her daughter, Meadow Mardsen.

"Can't I have a bit more time? I-I need to contact her father and - "

" - You can have all the time that you need. Her father has been a missing person for several years, so contacting him would be impossible."

Ms. Marsden furrowed her eyebrows and bit her lip. It would be like this day after day, for two years. Just sitting her, next to her daughter's hospital bed anticipating for her to wake.

But she never did.

"I don't believe she is in a coma," she would tell people, "She responds to light, moves around sometimes. It's impossible!"

She didn't believe that she was denying anything. Jenna Marsden was also a stubborn woman, and she wouldn't stop until she got what she wanted.

"Is there anyone else you'd like to contact?" The doctor asked her, but got no reply. Ms. Marsden was bewildered over the fact that her own daughter, who didn't have any health problems all of a sudden fell into a coma.

Well, no health problems with the exception of sleepwalking and nightmares.

But that wasn't as bad that they'd ever go to the doctors to get a check-up on. The only thing that they'd have to deal with was her fairy tales, her made-up world called Marvel.

Ms. Marsden looked over to her daughter. She remembered her co-worker once telling her that coma patients usually look like they're incredibly sick, like they're dead. Like the only thing that's keeping them alive is their heart and the machines that the doctors give them to keep their body half awake. It baffled her so that the human body could even do this. Essentially, a comatose person was supposed to die if they were by themselves.

She traced her hand across the pipe that connected to her. The pipe that allowed food into her system, so she wouldn't die of hunger.

Two years.

Ms. Marsden was sick of crying all the time, sick of being worried. She wondered what Meadow would have wanted. Would Meadow want to die if she knew that she was at the edge of her death? Or would she fight on, would she be stubborn?

It wasn't Jenna Marsden's decision. It was her daughter's. She wasn't going to pull the plug, it only mattered what Meadow's body decided to do.

* * *

"Dad?!"

I wasn't really sure what was going on for a full couple of seconds.

In fact, I wasn't even sure if I was in Marvel. how was my father here if I was in Marvel? No - how was my father here at all?

I remembered when he had disappeared for several days. My mother and I decided that it wasn't going to be a big deal, he'd be back, right? The days turned to weeks. Weeks to months, and eventually months to years. We knew that even if we filed in a missing person my father wasn't going to come back.

Boy, was I wrong.

"I've been wanting to see you for so long, but I was stuck here the whole time," he tried to explain, walking towards me and sitting on my bed next to me.

My head was spinning, though. I wasn't exactly sure what was going on: My father was here, I was most likely out of Marvel after being stuck in there for two years, I just got shot twice by a man I thought was dead for about two years, and that man was thought to be dead for several of years.

Oh, that and it was an AK 47. Seriously, who walks around with an AK 47 everywhere?

"Woah, woah - wait. Just hold on a minute. Can you please explain where I am? Am I in Marvel?"

My father looked at me in confusion.

"I mean - wait... does Iron Man exist here?"

That got his attention.

"That's exactly what I've been wanting to talk to you about! Yes, Iron Man is real here. See, the problem was a long time ago when I left, I didn't actually leave," he tried to explain once more.

"What? You mean that when you walked out of that door you didn't actually walk out of the door?"

"No - I mean that I... Well, yes, I did walk out of the door, that isn't what I'm trying to say..." he paused, like he was trying to search for words. I didn't realise how much pain I was in until I tried to shift up to see my father fully, mostly because I hadn't seen him in like 13 years. I made a face, lifting my back against the bed frame.

"You okay?" I nodded, assuring him that i'd be fine as he continued, "I got stuck here. I tried to escape, but one day I went to sleep and the next day... well, the next day I didn't know where I was. This hadn't happen to me since I was a kid."

Questions rolled through my head. My father was just like me, or at least was like me. I stopped waking up too. Did this mean I was stuck in Marvel forever, just like my father? Did that mean I wasn't in a coma in my mother's world, that I just went disappearing instead? No, don't think about it, I told myself. Everything was fine in the other world.

But I knew it wasn't. I knew that my mum was angry, that I hadn't woken in two years. I was just glad I wasn't dead. I realised that this wasn't okay, that I needed to get home as soon as I could. I had family waiting for me on the other side, and remembering all the pain that me and my mum went through when my father never came back made me rethink my situation.

"I'm just like you, dad." I said, "Or at least - I was. Does that mean I've gone too? In mum's world?" I knew it was a childish question, but I needed to ask it. I was happy that I finally got to see my dad, but I wasn't sure whether I was supposed to be angry with him for leaving or relieved that I now know the truth.

"I don't know, kid," he said, "But I did know that you were like me. I've known for a while."

I was still confused. All I wanted right now was food.

"I knew the whole time - or at least had a feeling - because the man passes down the mutant gene."

* * *

**PREVIEW: **"You're a mutant, Meadow. Well, not exactly a mutant, but more of like a Dimension Strider."


	12. Chapter 12: Answers

**5/21/14: Unedited. **

**I'll probs update today too. Stay in tune!**

**Cheers -**

* * *

**Chapter 12: Answers**

A mutant. That's why. After all this time, and I had no idea?

I guess it made sense, then. When I went to sleep, I woke up in a new world. That must be my power, right? But in a way I felt like that wasn't right. I controlled my power just fine, but now I all of a sudden can't control anything? Either that or I stopped doing something which made it so that I couldn't go back to the other world. It was possibly the fact that I didn't drink chocolate milk that night, just Pepsi. Perhaps Pepsi was the reason! I never would have thought that. But Pepsi wasn't a –

My father broke my thoughts when he said, "You're a mutant, Meadow. Well, not exactly a mutant, but more of like a Dimension Strider."

I thought about it for a second. It sounded cool, "Dimension Strider". Like one of the superhero names, probably like Iron Man of Captain America.

"Why'd you chose now to tell me this?" I asked, eyebrows furrowed. I was really good at being confused all the time, and although it was my forte it wasn't something I liked. I hated it when people didn't explain things to me clearly. I guess that was the reason why I was so slow in school, too.

"Because," he said, "I guess you can say even though I knew my whole life, we were in a completely different place. You don't belong in that other world, you originally belong here," he explained.

"I belong in Marvel?" I asked, "I mean, I've called it Marvel my entire life… It's been with me my entire life." I felt another sharp pain on my arm, and groaned.

"May be we should just let you settle down a bit. I think – "

" – No, I need to know this. How was I even born here?"

"You _belong_ here. There's a difference. People like you and me, we're from Marvel – or whatever you call it – people with abilities pioneer from here."

It still didn't make that much sense. I didn't fully understand my ability and how I could ever control it. It always felt like a lucid dream, but I had no power over my lucid dreaming. I couldn't control when I woke up in the other world before either. Was there even a possibility that I could sleep in peace?

"There's a school," my father started, and I knew where this was going. "Xavier's school for Gifted Youngsters. I was planning to enroll you into that, but at the time when you were born I couldn't seem to gain control over my sleep. If I did, I'd send you there."

So I could send people from the other world into Marvel. Of course, I'm pretty sure my father never did it before because of the little knowledge he had on his power, but I asked him anyways, "Did you ever 'stride' with someone before?" I assumed that the word stride was the most appropriate, conceivably because it was the only word that I could reach amidst all the questions that were surging through my head.

My father hesitantly replied, "Well, um, yes."

That caught me off guard.

"What? Who?"

My father didn't reply. He was silent for a very long time, like he was trying to explain something without offending me.

"I had another daughter before I had you, Meadow," he tried to explain. I leaned forward, my curiosity causing me to do so. Another daughter? I had a sister?

"We named her Katherine. Called her Kitty. Her name was Kitty Marsden for as long as we had her, but because I had no idea how to control my powers, we lost her," he said. He looked like he got another part of him ripped off, like he felt incredibly guilty because of this.

"What happened?" I asked, trying not to edge on too much. I understood that my father was in pain, remembering what he had done without purpose.

"I woke up at the wrong time. I didn't have her in my arms. I tried to sleep again, but when I came back to Marvel I was in a completely different place.

"Then I finally found her. But the problem was, it took so long she had already had a new family. The Prydes," he said, "They took her in. Now she's Shadowcat. Kitty Pryde."

I couldn't say anything. I was so shocked, all this happened and It took him more than twenty years to tell me? At that moment everything that seemed important to me didn't seem interesting at all. It didn't matter whether I was a mutant, or that I was level 5, or that I was in a comatose state in the other world or that Al was probably running around looking for me, or that SHIELD thought I was long dead. The only thing that mattered was Kitty's lost childhood. The one where everything was a lie, the one where she was looked at in confusion when her adopted parents found out that she was a mutant.

I wasn't sure if I was angry at my father for leaving her even though he found her, or if I was pitying him for being such a fool. I knew that It was cruel, but how could he do this to her? How could he do it to himself, to mum? Or even to me? They didn't even bother telling me that I had a sister.

"I want to meet her," I mumbled. I wasn't even sure if I wanted to or not.

"First thing's first, though," my dad cut off, his bright smile back on his face, "SHIELD think's you're dead. That's great. You need to stay dead, make sure that they have no idea that you're alive. You've been gone for a while too, so that won't be a problem."

My dad urged on, when I realised that I wasn't really sure how long I was out. It felt like hours talking to him, mostly catching up on how he's been and the things that he's seen and what was actually happening to me, and it also felt like a whole bunch of information being thrown at me. First, the he was alive. Second, I was a mutant. Third, there was a school that could help me control my mutant-y powers. Fourth, I had a sister named Kitty Pryde who had no idea that she was adopted and from a totally different universe.

"Dad?" I asked, "Exactly how long was I out?"

My dad stopped talking, realizing then that I wasn't listening to him.

"Seven Days."

* * *

**PREVIEW: **

"You told me about my sister, about my ability, what I am, almost every single potholes and questions in my life, and you didn't bother to tell me that I was out cold for seven days?!"


	13. Chapter 13: Gears

326 days in slumber.

March 26, 2014

"You told me about my sister, about my ability, what I am, almost every single potholes and questions in my life, and you didn't bother to tell me that I was out cold for seven days?!"

My father only grinned sheepishly, scratching the back of his head like it was no big deal. I wasn't too angry, just annoyed. I was in pain, confused, and I just needed to figure out what was happening.

"I mean, if you think about it, this situation would be worse if you woke up to me holding Starbucks in my hands," he tried to reassure. It then realised that it didn't really matter how ad of a parent my father was, because it's not like he was there that whole entire time when I was a kid anyways.

"Can you at least tell me where I am?" I asked, massaging my temple. I had a minor headache.

"Yemen."

I groaned. How did I get from Hawaii to Yemen? But then again, I was out cold for seven days.

"Alright, you know what, I need to call Al and tell him that I'm still alive," I told my father, trying to figure out what I was going to do with that situation first. I was aware that Al and I were probably not on right terms right now, mostly because I hung up on him while running away from explosions and didn't tell him what was happening while he had revealed what his mission was truly about.

I thought back to what he had said. I needed to tell him that I was alive and well, be frankly this mission didn't matter anymore. There was no way that Evans survived that plan, unless in that debriefing pakcer Fury forgot to put in something about him being a super-mutant like me. The Winter Soldier was someone with incredible power, and the only person who could probably go toe-to-toe with him would be Captain America himself.

But if Bucky was truly the Winter Soldier, then how would Steve react to it? I never had really thought about it, conceivably because I was just learning about myself. I shrugged the thought aside and looked down to my cracked sunglasses. I hoped they still worked, because honestly, they were hella rad.

I slipped them on, forgetting that my father was still in the room and switching them on. It was a big mistake in the beginning to not play around with them, because I literally had no idea what I was doing. I finally found that contact buttons, and dialed Al's number.

The first thing he was, "Damn, I knew you were alive."

I couldn't help but smile as he continued to yell at me. They were mostly, "How did you even survive that explosion?" and "I got to see my daughter" but other than that, I almost was up to the point of tuning him out.

I adjusted the comm and cleared my throat. "If you're done," I said, "I'd like to explain what the hell has been going on."

Al finally shut up, letting me explain where I was. I let out the detail that my father was here, because I wanted to tell him that in person and I didn't have that much time. I had explained to him that I was in Yemen and that I was trying to figure out how I even got here, and I told him I only had a couple of minor injuries.

This was mostly because Natasha kept telling me not to trust anyone. You never knew who could be listening in, and it was hazardous enough that I told Al my location and condition. I needed to get things done now, and I didn't know who else to turn to but Al.

What bewildered me so was that SHILED didn't send and extraction team or anything. They couldn't find me, and it was so mind boggling because wouldn't they try their hardest to keep a new agent safe? I also didn't understand how Caravyl could just leave me there.

God. I should've known, Caravyl. He was the kind of people that I couldn't trust at all.

"Al, I need to know where you are. There are traitors in SHIELD, and you need to know who they are. I need to find you…" I trailed off when I realised that no one was listening. There was no sound at the other end of the line.

"Al?"

Static.

"This is HYDRA. We've got your partner. We want you to fix the Winter Soldier, Doctor Willa Jost. If you fail to do so, then Alphonse Ignetos will die, as well as his daughter."

I was in trouble.

Actually, no, Al was in trouble. How did he manage to get me in this mess? But then again, I was dead to seven days. I was still angry at SHIELD, but I didn't have time to be. I needed to track the call back. I needed to tell them that I wasn't this "Willa Jost" person, whoever she was.

I was scared. I was shaking, my heart was beating fast and I couldn't concentrate on what I was doing.

"Don't worry," my father said, "We'll find him."

And I knew we were. Because I was good with computers, better than them than I was in the field. I could do this. I could save his life.

"Okay. I've got the code. All I need to do is use tracert from Run and figure the IP address out. Other than that, I'll be – "

" – Don't say anything. Just keep working," My father told me. I immediately stopped speaking and listened to him. I was the one under pressure, I was the one with the anxiety. So it was best if I just listened to him now.

"How's your search for Willa Jost?" I asked my father a little later, when I finally got the IP address. I was just sinking it into the generator when my father started to explain.

"She's majored in engineering. She's from Yemen, that's probably why the captors thought you were her. In order to contact her we need to figure out a secure network, because right now she's in hiding. You can tell by observing her record, she's a brilliant woman."

My father explained this in a clear, slow way. I got him, and I was thankful. I needed things to be explained in a certain way, and this was perfect.

"Alright, I need you to do everything you can to get your hands on contacting her. I'm going on a hunt for the Winter Soldier."

I was just about to get up when my father stopped me.

"Wait," he said. "you need to be careful. You're going with no ammo? With no weapons? You don't know this guy, and he's extremely harmful. You don't even know how to fix him."

I knew that he was right. I was running into this way too fast.

"We need to figure out how to fix him. Find a way to contact Dr. Jost, do you have anything here that I can use for self-defense or something?"

My father looked hesitant, but eventually pointed below us. "There's a bunch of gadgets and guns downstairs in the basement. Be careful, I've got a ton of them and they're all my babies. Don't get a big one, just a bunch of tiny pistols and make sure you've got daggers and – "

" – Hey, I'll be fine. I know this guy is dangerous – " my father flinched at that – "But I know what I'm doing. I've got this, I promise, and I won't let you down." I smiled at my father's concern. It was nice to have it, even after all this time. It was like something that I missed in my childhood.

I wasn't sure if this power was a blessing. I had no idea how to use it, but I knew that if I was to learn I'd use to for good. I'd use it to set things right with my family.

As my father went on to search a way to contact Dr. Jost, I made my way downstairs to the basement. And as I did that, my heart dropped.

It was like Nick Fury's paradise.

There were several guns stacked up to the top, just sitting there dusting away. There was also ammo on the table in the middle, several different sizes of bullet and the description of them underneath. Now I was just curious of what my father did for a living, especially in Yemen of all places.

Along the wall in front of me where ancient versions of knives, daggers, and swords. I didn't realise how wide I was grinning until I hear footsteps coming down the stairs, and my father strode in.

"How is it? Quite the collection, aye?"

I couldn't say anything. I was so shocked, I was basically fangirling form the inside.

"What can I take?"

"Anything."

There was so much to choose from. I didn't know where to start, but thankfully when my father left and came back with a suit for me to wear it was easier to pick.

It was a dark blue and black cat suit-like outfit. At the sides were stripes of blue, and over top I wore the same blue leather jacket. I was given some boots too, where I kept two hidden knives. I also wore a belt, and strapped two pistols to my waist. It was hidden by my jacket, which also hid a dagger strapped onto my wrist. I was given two long swords as well, which weren't hidden but sheathed and hanging on my back.

My dad readied me right.

"I've gotten contact with Willa Jost. She's said that she's' just out of town, actually, and she's on her way here."

I looked at my father in confusion. "I don't want to know how you persuaded her," I said.

"Well, that doesn't matter because when I told her Al's name, she said she was on her way," MY dad replied.

I tried to think back again. Willa Jost. Did he ever mention her before? I couldn't remember ever hearing her name, but I shook the thought aside.

"Probably like a colleague or something," I said, "You're right, that's irrelevant. I'll be gone by the time she comes so just keep her busy. I need you and her to track down Al while I'm off to find Bucky, after that I'll figure something out."

My heart was beating like crazy, and I was sure to get an adrenaline rush soon. I felt like I knew what I was doing exactly, and had a plan perfectly planned out. I could do this.

"You're not just going to hand an innocent guy like that in, though, right?" My dad asked.

I didn't know what to say.

I didn't want to hand Bucky in. I firmly believed that he was still in there, I knew that Bucky was alive. I just had to figure out how I was going to get him back, figure out how to make sure that when I find him it's Bucky Barnes, not the Winter Soldier.

"Like I said, I'll figure it out." I was in a hurry now. Because if it was the other way around, Al wouldn't wait to save my life. Not even a second.

I ran back upstairs, my father following me. Right before I walked out the door, he stopped me.

"Wait," he said. Impatiently I turned around, my mind in twenty places at once. There was so much going through my head at once, and I just needed to calm down.

"Take my bike," my dad said, pointing to his motorcycle outside, "and Meadow… good luck."


End file.
